Lost in Couch
My living room is currently all sorts of disheveled and its driving me crazy. This is somehow a prevailing paradigm of my life…
Rather than succumbing to the idea of taking in a roommate I’ve decided to move into a substantially smaller space across the parking lot. In addition to having all my shit spread out this week, my boss is in town, I’m dog sitting and I’ve had a very strange desire to reference odd combinations of literature dealing with things such as Romanian Gypsy culture and Goddesses as well as philosophical works and cookbooks. I think I’m confused. But I’m having fun in the process, err phase…
I’m kind of going to miss this space that I’ve lived in for barely 7 months but alas, times they are a changin’. Ohh, the fond memories of porch parties, love affairs, impaling my arm on a fence and the wretchedly small kitchen space of which not enough delicious home cooked meals came out of. But hey, I did my best.
My week ends tomorrow with a work day, a nice loooong evening walk with Oswald and an adventure to Bass Hall for a symphony based in Celtic traditional sounds.
I yearn for a quiet and calm weekend, but I have a feeling its mostly going to be forgetting complete meals, copious amounts of booze and, oh yea, moving my home.
Not only the best dog, but the best boy to snuggle to.
Old porch view.
Old sunset view from my living room.
Transient Thoughts
Today I got burned. So I cleaned my house and moved my living room into my middle room. Quite an accomplishment for a girl with a gimp arm.
I have a roommate moving in and I’m slightly weary. Since I’ve been on my own I’ve never had a roomie, mainly because I like a lot of Danielle time and reading naked on my couch. Oh well, I will have to sacrifice for a few months.
For the rest of this month I just want to stay inside and write music and make crafts and baked goods. There’s only one way to get through a funk and that’s by being productive.
How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
I Drink 1000 Ship Wrecks
Last night I sat around with my friend Matt and we conversed in depth about Marxism while I ate nearly an entire pizza pie.
This morning I’m just trying to embrace the fact that I’m a quirky, over-analytical girl that is, more often than not, in the wrong place at the wrong time and that’s not about to change because for the most part, I can’t help who I am.
I want to lose the girly-emotional-fake-shitty part about my sex drive. I also want to clean my house and not be so nervous all the time about shit that doesn’t even matter. I want to take more time to appreciate everything and everyone I have in my life. I really just want to learn more. Mostly though, I want to let go.
Surely you can understand my exact disposition because it makes PERFECT sense.
Quite frankly, I’m sick of fucking up and taking things for granted. I’m sick of feeling like I’m ungrateful, unintelligent, and completely inadequate.
Is this what it feels like to be a grown up?
I’m trying. I promise.
Conglomerate
These are left overs from my session with Mandy. I actually really like the residue of character that bleeds into these. It was pretty funny wearing a bathrobe next to our towns “occupy” movement. I felt like I was bringing something to the table..
Here are more pictures that move me lately:
So proud of my little-big brother. Words can’t even express. He is currently living his dream, and I couldn’t be happier for him. I’d also like to give a shout out to my parents for creating the perfect gentleman out of this dude. Quite a looker also, ain’t he?
One very magical summer there was an Owl family camped outside of my upstairs bedroom window. I thought that summer would never end.
My two bestest pals! Mandy and Kelsey. We make a pretty powerful team. I admire these ladies on a daily basis. Mandy has been my best friend since I was 12 and Kelsey has been so dear to me for a number of years now. I cherish time with them both, be it cry time, laugh time, girly gossip time, dinner time—whatever. These gals quite often put things into perspective for me in ways that only a best friend can. I am grateful.
Did I ever show you the most fancy boots I’ve ever seen? Or have I ever explained my inclination to take random pictures of random people or adornments about town?
HAHAHAHA. My parents. Circa 1979. We have so much hair in my family. Isn’t my mom beautiful? Her cheeks are something supernatural. Also, I’ve never seen my dad without a mustache. Or without HUGE MUSCLES THAT WILL BEAT YOU UP.
Power animal. I love elephants. And their trunks up is good luck. At least that’s what my Grandmother tells me.
Just admiring my Grandfather. One of the most wise men I’ve ever had the pleasure in knowing. I think about him daily. Miss you, pop pop.
(Source: britta-perry, via lionlingo)
Roman Tics
My afternoon has been overflowing with beauty. I’ve looked around and taken in the earth coming back to life, as the Springtime Goddess lightens in slumber and slowly makes her way inside these city walls. I’ve eaten delicious pieces of fruit with lovely friends and quietly admired the love between lovers. Moments in silence, which are more often than not difficult to accomplish, are one of the most satisfying things to me.
Despite my “game face”, black wardrobe and fascination with things dark, I’m a total sap and I really do try to stay in tune with my romantic element, even in the most simple of ways…be it culinary delicacies I create for myself and/or friends to enjoy, wine and merriment with those dear to me, a simple gesture or gift to let someone I know and care for acknowledge that I am thinking of them in all ways that love. These things, to me, are some of the most romantic indulgences I have found in this life. I am grateful.
Its been a hectic year so far; experiences I’ve had I promise myself I will not ever lose sight of- I digress…Its been less than quiet in my mind lately. This afternoon was one of the first days in a while where I’ve been able to sit back and gaze into the abundance of beauty surrounding us in this life and on this Earth for more than 10 minutes. I have felt a constant, uninterrupted and graceful appreciation all afternoon.
A few hours into this mind/soul trip today, I chose to revisit the Song of Songs and it spoke to me in quite a different way than I’ve interpreted it in the past. I’m not sure if its because I’m more mature now or if I’m content in my solitude at this juncture and not actively seeking out a lover, but it spoke to me as more of a testament of respect, patience and quiet admiration, rather than a proclamation of ones love in a more physical sense. The repeated verse “Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires” really called out to me in a way I can’t necessarily explain. It doesn’t quite suggest that love will find you, but rather that in letting go of our wants and desires or “needs” we are somehow, by the ways of God or the universe or whatever you want to call it, forced to look at things differently; from an angle that is completely lacking. In doing so, I’ve found so much beauty and discovered some much needed patience. Its easily one of the most exhilarating epiphanies I’ve ever had!
To further express the romance and beauty I’m feeling I’ve complied some art deco pictures along with my favorite bit from Song of Solomon for YOU:
Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth
For thine love is better than wine
His fruit was sweet to my taste
His left hand is under my head and his right hand doeth embrace me
Behold! Thou art fair, my love. Behold! Thou art fair.
Thine lips are like a thread of scarlet, thine eyes are as doves behind the veil, and comely is thy mouth. Thine two breasts are like fawns feeding among the lilies. The navel is like a round goblet wherein no mingled wine is wanting. Thine belly is like a heap of wheat set about with lilies. Let thy breasts be as clusters on the vine and thine mouth like the best wine.
Open to me, my dove. For my head is filled with the drops of the night.
Come my beloved, let us see if the vine flourishes and the tender grapes appear and the pomegranates bud forth.
Sickly
What do you do on a sick day? You’re bored. You’re miserable because you feel like total crap and you’ve already watched too much Seinfeld…so seriously, you’ve got the whole day ahead of you! What are you going to do?
This is what I did today…
Walked around the neighborhood, pretending I wasn’t sick. Met the hot old dude that remodeled this church into his house…he invited me in, but I didn’t go inside. This slightly reminds me of the remodeled house in Beetle Juice.
Went through a tub of old costumes…this one was when I was a rabbit in a hat. Get it? Magic. heh…….
Said HIIIII to my next door neighbor and best pal.
Made some arts & crafts..
Looked through old pictures. At least I finally kind of grew into my eye balls!
Called my mom. She made me laugh.
Wished it was like this outside, I felt awesome and could hang out at Trinity Park.
Called the step brother to congratulate him on his recent musical endeavors…and to talk about Dinosaurs.
Relaxed to the maxxx.
Of course, I also drank a lot of herbal tea and ate peanut butter. But who cares about that?
xo
Photo Update
So my bestest friend Mandy was excited about her new Nikon 7d923487xyz camera she got recently. She’s been doing some professional headshots, weddings, etc…
Her style is unique and what I really like about her work is that she very lightly edits her pictures. In this particular instance I opted for a little heavier editing along with the originals just to try something new and colourful. We also took a few sets of multiple exposures to make fun .gif files.
Our creative collaborations have always turned out in such a way that pleases us both. We bounce ideas off of each other and work well together. Hurray for 15 year old friendships!
At any rate, I wanted to post a few of these pictures here to share with the 3 of you that poke your head in from time to time:
Happy creating!
Lights downtown!
